I haven’t written much lately. I haven’t wanted to expose what I am really feeling/thinking. I’m very good at going about my daily life and living on, but I never forget. Never. No one has successfully managed to maintain my attention like you, but I won’t let you know that. I allow my pride to win sometimes. I don’t even know what to say or even what words to use anymore. Part of me hates you so bad. I’m angry at you because how things went down for just no reason. At least no reason that I could get an explanation for. It’s like all that time was just wasted for no reason at all. I want to know why. I just want to hate you so bad, but still….I don’t.
I wrote and recorded this myself on my lap top, for my brother…. Miyagi . this song was really just intended for him to hear….. but i thought it would be nice to share ….
i was so nervous to play it for him myself, so when i left to San Francisco on Thursday I had my TT play it for him….
She said his breath got calm as he listened and i know he heard every word ….
later that night he became the angel he was born to be and i am so grateful that he got to hear this before he left on his infinite journey….
now i hear him telling ME , what i was singing to him… to not give up .
i love you SO much Miyagi!!!! . Everything x2 now. Everything for you now ….
I woke up missing you today.
I’m not sure if I should let you know.
If you missed me, you’d let me know.
I’m not going to say anything then…
YOLO though? lol